Live that dream

Did you ever have a dream that happened - something that right before your eyes turned into reality? I did. I am grateful for that. And yet the selfish part of me wants to remain an entrepreneur, not return to just being a normal person with a regular job.


But the risks and the dead end I've arrived at within the last several years are more than writing on the wall and I'm smart enough to see that....right? I am, and I'd still do it all over again if I could relocate; but I'm 20 years older and while far more savvy I'm also perhaps not as able to pull 20 hour work days getting moved, set up and established for a new beginning. And there's this bad taste in my mouth from the situation I'm in and perhaps this IS what's best, for me.


But for YOU - wanting desperately to make that leap, to break out on your own and write that new chapter - do it. Don't let it slip by because that may be the best time of your life. For me it was.

#store #closing #familyowned #ghostsofthepast #smallbusinessowners #entrepreneur #dream #deathofasmallbusiness #thefinal90 #independentretailer #lastseason #closingforever #locallyowned #momandpop #fading #oldtimeshop #‎thefinal90‬ ‪#‎storeclosing‬ #sadness #newcareer

The many stages of saying goodbye

I thought I'd been through the challenging parts already. So many things this far have been far harder than I anticipated and I'll admit that for a few days earlier this month I actually breathed. In a way it seemed that some of most difficult tasks which had loomed on the horizon were completed and now there was no turning back.

I'd given the required notice to my landlord and after days of dragging my feet had finally posting the "closing forever" signs. I'd learned how to field questions of all varieties and varying degrees of rudeness and had even made a few feeble attempts to take some of my personal items home from the store.

But for just under two decades this store HAS been my home: it's where I've laughed, learned, cared, grown, educated, cried, and where I swore I'd never give up on something I loved so much. It was, as I'd mentioned in a previous post, the place where "I'd come out of the dark" as a shattered life was rebuilt and a new place in the world was created.

This shop where I'd connected with so many hundreds and thousands of people across the years, was so much more than "just a job" to me and to some extent when you run your own ship I think you have to feel that way. I made a mistake that will be hard to warn others about and difficult to explain; I'd fallen in love with my business. That's not something you should ever do I guess, because when if the time comes when you have to say goodbye, it's going to be so much more than just a change in where you work. It's going to hurt like hell. I know that now because I'm there.

#sayinggoodbye #finally #closing #endofanera #goodbyemomandpop #thefinal90 #storeclosing #lovelocal #community #choices #small #shops #localbusinesses #closed #lettinggo #after35years #loved

Accountability

It's a word I mention often and something by which I live. And ever since I wrote yesterday's blog post I've been a little annoyed. It took me until this afternoon to figure out why, but I finally got it.

That doesn't sound like me - not the real me. It sounds as if I'm whining about costs, complaining that "life is hard", etc. when in reality I'd normally be fighting for what I loved. And I did love this shop - the one that I'm letting go, in a process that I've often described as cutting off my arm. Maybe I cared so much because I have been through the rough years and the very difficult times. Maybe it's because I fought hard to stand for something and then even harder to keep it all together. So for me to throw in the towel now - am I really ok with just blaming it on others, rising expenses and landlords?

No, I'm not ok with that and I COULD have stayed if I'd wanted. It's conceivable that my very competitive sales structure could have been adjusted; that my shop would have began to resemble the chain stores with a smaller selection at ghastly prices. I didn't HAVE to carry those stupid melt-in-your-mouth mints that came only from Ohio because I was determined to offer my customers the best. Surely a factory in china creates something similar, right? So why am I faithfully buying something more expensive "just because"? 

One can pick and choose items and merchandise as a sole proprietor, and one can also make poor choices. If I stuck to my guns on those damn mints there was likely a whole slew of similar products that I could also be purchasing more cheaply. So why did the mints, which in turn represented how I do business, what my choices have been and ultimately, how I'm running my shop - matter? Because they don't have an awful artificial taste, and they don't burn your mouth but rather melt on your tongue. Because when the day before a 29th birthday, the other half of my life was diagnosed with cancer. It took my breath away and almost took the business when I walked out to be there in the hospital day after day after day. We learned about medical terms, surgeries, doctor's visits and the endless game of waiting for results. We found that so many things in life both started to matter and also ceased to be a priority, how self-employed insurance was a nightmare and a joke and how during chemo that nothing tastes right.

Except for those damn mints. They did the trick and helped offer some bit of taste to counter dry mouth that comes with months of treatments. Having lost a parent at an early age to the same dreadful disease, I was aware of how little a cancer patient enjoys. I tried to never  run out of them in he following years. My customers knew I have something for everyone and so it did matter that I sold the best. And no one who happened to mention in conversation that their relative was fighting hard through a chemo program, ever left without a bag of mints.

So you see, I had my choices, was able and willing to choose inferior product for higher profits. But that's not how my daddy raised me. He always told me you do what is right and honorable, because that's just how we live, and so the part about cutting corners just wasn't an option for me. And yesterday's whining about costs that went up as foot traffic went down; how it all came to a crunch one day - well, I had my choices and chances and I made them. I made the right ones for me and didn't settle. Because you know, when you start caving in on one thing.....then pretty soon it's another, and then another. And then what you have is lack of pride in what you do. That's not what I picked.

P.S. Don't get me wrong; it's nice and affirming and perhaps soul - finding to do something that you believe is right. But that doesn't make it easier. While it's pretty therapeutic to bleed and weep all over this keyboard and blog about doing the right thing it still hurts like heck to say goodbye. 

I'd like to have a few less days with leaky eyes, but then again if I didn't care this much I guess almost two decades wouldn't have mattered the way they do. Still, it's pulling off pieces of me to leave and I wish I could stay, do everything on my terms and live the good life. I'm gonna miss this so much.....more than I can say.

#commitment #to #quality #standards #madeintheusa #loyalty #thebest #refusingtosettle #principles #buttermints #meltaways #stickingupforwhatsright #meltinyourmouth #chemo #lackoftaste #comforting

Operating costs do rise

 I'm fairly sure I've mentioned before that as I dump/bleed/unload my thoughts here on this blog, that some posts may be relevant to certain people and others may not connect with that particular bit of info at all. I'm not doing separate blogs for those who may care like I do about being loyal to local businesses, or those who are small shop owners, or for those who may simply be curious. Most of my entries are about a specific topic or issue and this one may be more geared towards other independent owners or those considering a storefront. Think carefully before you get into something that you may not have added up all the costs for.


People ask me often - too often, perhaps - for specific reasons I'm closing the store. It's far to complicated to put into words honestly, as there are a number of reason, factors and causes for this decision. Many folks seem to enjoy speculating for possible causes and reasons, and tied for first place in how many times I've heard them, the two top guesses are A, the rent was raised or B, I'm retiring. At 43 option B is not in the cards....or perhaps that's meant to inform me I look far older than 43. Option A is not quite correct either because it wasn't specifically the rent; it was the "other fees" that have been adding up. And by adding up I mean increasing as well as new costs that have appeared out of thin air, sometimes creeping up subtly until one day you sit down and really look at what it's costing to have a storefront. Of course, if you own the building where you operate you are far ahead of the game as each mortgage payment is an investment rather than a drain.

Rent is spelled out in a lease which lasts a year, two or more. Mine has crept up a little over the 19 years but not much, so it's the other costs that have started to take a bite out of profits. Most owners have a "CAM" (common area maintenance) fee which covers trash and upkeep around the shopping center or complex. Mine at one time was $300 and it's safe to say that as of 2014 it's increased somewhere around 12 times that amount. Things cost more and many increases are understandable but a few years ago, due to expenses, our trash cans were removed from the facility - the ones that customers would use for a coffee cup, etc. We were told it was no longer affordable to have individual receptacles and without them - well, people drop their trash in potted plants, corners, just about anywhere. Of course visitors are not going to hike to the end of the parking lot to find the dumpster so it seemed unfortunate that this happened. And our fees didn't decrease; they continued to rise. I think something so basic annoyed a number of merchants because suddenly we seemed like evil little people expecting garbage cans to be available for our customers.


In our vacation town, a charge termed the Gross Receipts tax had been in place for those who rented out homes to summer visitors. I can see how that fee was charged to those who collected the money, i.e., the homeowners, but it wasn't levied against vacationers. Yet about five years ago when the town felt that all rental arrangements should pay this, including businesses who rented a storefront, the fee came directly to us, the merchants. It still doesn't seem quite right to me since I'm not the one profiting from rental of a space, but the motion passed and an additional $360 per year was tacked on to the bill upon renewal of a yearly license.


Business license for the state is $75.00 and for the town is $196. Insurance rises every single year whether or not a claim is filed. And workman's comp has it's own separate blog post a few weeks back that you can read to see how that went for me and why I ultimately lost it. A few years ago when the decision was made for the shopping center to convert from it's well to town water we were all assessed an additional fee. And yet with a rental property that our family owned, when the property was improved those costs weren't passed on to the tenant; it was our investment.


There are so many things to consider when operating a business and expenses are perhaps the biggest issue. But it's important to think about how much of the additional expenses you can legitimately pass on to your customers - and I'm at the point where I don't want to keep raising prices. Fixed costs are one thing, but those which keep rising because they are outside of the lease - that is starting to irk me a bit.


How much is too much? Well, for some retail stores, such as the jewelry shop or upper-right clothing, they may not feel that increases are a big deal. Compare that to the smaller overall sale-per- customer that a candy shop may have and I'm feeling a bit uneasy. A $750 water bill to improve a property that isn't mine - well, that's a lot of candy to sell. I can't say that my business model is wrong because for so many years it worked. But lately more factors are coming up that make me realize why so many small shops are ultimately closing here. Perhaps we ARE the small potatoes that can't cut it after all.

Changes on the horizon

I've said before several times that there are a number of reasons for closing my store. Some of them related to the business of retail and how people seem to buy these days as opposed to years ago. Part of it had to do with an area chain featuring multiple locations; most recently in the neighborhood of 25 stores nearby. Saturation was the goal and they had the funds to do it.

That competition had always been present, even almost 20 years ago when this began, but there were others who like me, had their own following as well. These similar independents were spread through the towns and although the chain stores were present, there seemed to be an atmosphere of choice and variety.


Looking back now I think I'd have to admit that while the other 12 or 13 independent confectionery shops were around, people were aware of options. But as shops faded and closed perhaps so did the minds of our visitors. When you see choices, it's likely you explore more, but as places like mine disappeared I think it began to convince customers to stick with the most visible option.


And then suddenly, about seven years ago, my smaller competition vanished and I became the last of the independents. Rather than shrink and fade from sight, I branded my shop with what the chains were not. I adamantly followed one of the most basic rules in retail; be different. With some items the bigger stores featured being imported from china and thus poor quality, I continued to offer the best products made here in the USA. Customers would come in daily asking questions such as "but YOU still have the real kind, right?", and we did.


With this goal of excelling in certain niches and maintaining my own distinct following, why did I decide to close? As much as I hated to admit it, my store was impacted by what surrounded me. What once was a thriving and vibrant shopping destination, began to decline and perhaps has been one of the hardest changes for me to see and accept. (To be continued)